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A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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