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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
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We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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